Did you know?
Did you know that the leading cause of blindness is — wait for it — battery explosions?
That’s right. Sitting in the line up at the Albion Ferry on Thursday night, one of the attendants busted out some gigantic Motomaster battery charger machine to give some juice to a stalled vehicle when I overheard her impart this bit of wisdom.
And here I though masturbation was behind all the bumping into walls. Sheesh, learn something from a ferry every day.
And then I arrived at work the next day to this: “Did you know the guy who plays David Bowie’s assistant in The Prestige is the same guy who played Gollum?”
Now, I could have, as one member of the work crew did, pretended to know this little bit of tripe, this smidgen of non-important information, but I didn’t.
I’m not averse to displaying my ignorance. Heck, I know a lot of things, but no, I had no idea the guy who played David Bowie’s assistant in The Prestige was the same guy who played Gollum.
I should have known, considering I’m a huge Gollum fan myself, have posters, life-size plush toys, the lunchbox/thermos set, and the telephone shaped like him that says “My precious” when it rings…get it, rings, in like Lord of the Rings. Gawd I’m hilarious.
It’s funny the things a person recalls through life, the things we will never forget. The things that stick with us and pop up randomly, whether it is through some obscure Jeopardy! question, or while watching a much edited version of Joe Dirt on TBS.
Did you know that raccoons don’t have salivary glands? That’s why they wash their food before they eat it.
That little bit of trivia comes straight from Mrs. Marples Grade 1 class at Fraserview Elementary School, circa 1984.
Did you know that the really popular girls from high school will invariably end up skinny, sporting low self-esteem and drug abusing ex-husbands 10 years later? That little bit of info comes courtesy of the class of 1996 Mission Secondary Grad Reunion.
Did you know that, I, Danna Bach, know more about random celebrities than I do my closest friends?
For instance, I know that the other day Paris Hilton was found driving with a suspended licence, I know that Jessica Biel had to leave a Stella McCartney fashion show because she was hung-over from a raging party the night before, and I know that Jennifer Garner is staying in White Rock as she films in Vancouver.
I don’t know what my friends are doing this weekend, if they’re having relationship problems or if they’ve seen any good movies lately.
But I know that Heath Ledger and Michelle Williams are on the rocks.
Why do I know these things, and does knowing them make me a bad person, or just a shallow one?
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